My husband is a big advocate for Craig's List. A few weeks ago we posted an old Pottery Barn couch that my kids have been jumping on for years. We reduced the price down-down-down to $50 and finally somebody bit.
Let's call her Candy. Candy could only come during the middle of the day when I would be at home alone. I knew that she would need to bring someone who was very strong to help move the couch.
My mind immediately went to the fact that I was going to be somehow violently maimed and left for dead with the door wide open as they walked out with the couch.
What kind of sick fantasy world do I live in where I think someone named Candy is going to come rape and murder me and leave me for dead when she might just want my couch?
So I held my breath when the doorbell rang at 2:30, she was 30 minutes late which only further solidified my theory. I opened the door and there was a nice sort of mousy looking brunette and behind her a Priest.
Literally a Priest, with the black clerical collar and cute German tortoise shell glasses.
Lisa, What the what??
As I'm diving deeper into my life coaching program I am learning how my mind constructs stories to limit me, keep me safely within my comfort zone. My life is really quite simple, normal and lovely. Why do I create limiting stories in my head? Maybe you do too, in some way shape or form. Like a story about why THAT guy turned you down, or why so-and-so looked at you that way this morning, or why you didn't win that job, why you just have NO TIME TO DO ANYTHING because shitty things ALWAYS happen to you, right?
I'm reading a book called Taming Your Gremlin, by Rick Carson, which has been super effective. I'm learning to recognize these voices in my head, not in a crazy way, but in a way that we all have in our head. The voice that that tell us what we should and shouldn't do, when we're right and wrong, when we are totally off-base or in my case think I'm going to be the next victim in a Craig's List killing. Because, like Madonna said, "I hear your voice, it's like an angel sighing, I have no choice." Right?
There are three steps to taming your gremlin.
- Breathe and be aware that you are a human being in real life, not in your mind.
- Notice and play with options, break out of your comfort zone and try something new.
- Always be in progress. I love this because it gives me grace and space to mess up with those options in step 2.
These three steps have kept me aware of my thoughts and helped me notice when I am limiting myself and getting lost in the crazy. They allow me to play with options like, What if I went this way or used this color, or tried this new yoga move? Or, this is a new one: what if I planned a vacation to Glacier National Park without knowing how or when we'd go? Or how we'd pay for it? Instead of thinking of all the reason why I can't do it, I play with options to do it. I bought a book about our National Parks to start.
This month, I invite you to notice your gremlin voice. What does she say? What does she stop you from doing? How is she limiting you? Is IT a she or a he? What's their name? How often does she pop into your head?
I'd love to hear your gremlin story! Seriously, this stuff fascinates me. The more we share the more we can support each other and get out of our own way and start dreaming up a cool ass future!